March 2009
2 posts
Angel
Her heads is on her knees
in holy submission
her back blending with
the concrete skyline
a child’s drawings
create a silent refuge
the chalk is shattered
like monochrome confetti
My disciple
has been had by the needles
And perverts
But her body is a prayer
She is God’s charity,
I extend from her shoulders
Two white fluoride wings
Broader than a feathered heart
She is a white...
End of the Year
Things are wrapping up for the year. My bank account is just about empty so I will be sating my inner alcoholic with schoolwork and BSG. My 5 grand I put in a GIC comes out on the 9th, though, so I will survive.
I have a lot due in the next two weeks, Phil 230 and 240 papers, my minimum 20-page creative writing program application, and my final Creative Writing 202 assignment.
I went to Emily...
February 2009
3 posts
hubbabubba nightmare
I have an infection in both of my eyes. My right one hurts to looks around and is really gross. I suppose this teaches me for rubbing my eyes incessantly. It hurts quite a bit and I can’t really see.
It has been nice being home. My family are great to be around, I’ve finally regained the perspective I lost having lived with them for so long. Before I left, it got to the point where I...
The Loss of my Glorious Short-term Memory.
Buchanan —> SUB—> Oriental Gardens—> Spanish Banks? —> Marine Drive —> Bottom of Wreck—> Vanier—> Bottom of Wreck—> Wilderness coast trek to the pirate ship—> Anthropology Museum—> Marine Drive —> Laser Beams communicating with another planet —>Botanical Gardens—>Exploring new...
Self-lovin'
It occurred to me today how much of my unhappiness is self-inflicted, illusory, and self-constructed. Since I was little, I’ve lived with a mentality of both other-dependency and general problem evasion. I have been skewing my perceptions of others and especially of my own behaviour for a long, long time. It is sad to think that my worst enemy has been myself. However, if there’s one...
January 2009
1 post
Back from the dead
I’m in Sigma Chi as of last Saturday, having finished a full week of implied silence, personal reflection, and character-building activities. It was probably the best thing I’ve done ever.
It was absurdly difficult in a way you can’t imagine. But as a product of the week, I’ve reached a new level of inner contentment, motivation, and confidence.
I’m also applying...
August 2008
1 post
Charles Bukowski- The Ice-Cream People
the lady has me temporarily off the bottle and now the pecker stands up better. however, things change overnight— instead of listening to Shostakovich and Mozart through a smeared haze of smoke the nights change, new complexities: we drive to Baskin-Robbins, 31 flavors: Rocky Road, Bubble Gum, Apricot Ice, Strawberry Cheesecake, Chocolate Mint… we park outside and look at icecream...
July 2008
1 post
Fact: bears eat beets.
My last entry was major depresso, so I thought I’d change it up with a fairly optimistic entry. I get to see my girlfriend today! Also, I’m getting my living situation for school worked out, hopefully living in a house with 5 of my best friends which would be killer. Also, it’s sunny. Also, I’m an only child for 10 days as my brother just left for UVic again, and my sister...
June 2008
2 posts
Rant
I just realized the primary item I confide in is my facebook status. I don’t think this is healthy. I decided not to be friends with Tony or Josh any more, as of this evening. The only thing I do is play tennis with Tony, so this will probably mean no exercise. They are horribly inconsiderate and don’t give a shit about anyone, and I feel continuing to be friends with them is saying I...
May 2008
1 post
It is 4:22 AM and my eyes sting.
I’ve been pretty unhappy back to home for a while now. I still stay up until 4-5am every night for no reason and now see people a whole lot less. I thought about taking a plane and going somewhere random and adventurous. It turns out this is not happening, because I told my dad I would work for him all summer. Commitments will continue to haunt me the rest of my life unless I somehow free...
April 2008
7 posts
Fresh start, etc.
I just got home from UBC. It is quite sad because I lost pretty much all of my friends in Abbotsford and am now losing my friends at UBC! Regardless, this means I’m moving out in 4 months and I’ve got some time for myself or something. My brother is visiting from Victoria and we’re getting along great which is new. Anyways, I’ll miss you guys! It’s been a great year...
Epic fail?
Shitty Things: I’m pretty damned sure I have a cancerous growth on my arm. I have avoided learning all year and have my exams to pay. I am scared I’ve either had a stroke or oncoming schizophrenia as my body has delocalized sensory reception and I can’t feel pain really, either. All the education I’m trying to cram is turning out to be things I ...
Things WoW Does to Me
Makes me inconsiderate Tunnel vision in terms of goals and enjoying life Makes me antisocial Perpetuates depressive mental schemas I don’t deal with problems and let them fester I don’t do other things I like to do I waste massive amounts of time I don’t sleep properly I become an ass hole. I’m not sure if abandoning my boat plan, or at least some travel plan, was such a good idea. I think I do...
I have trained myself to remember my dreams, for...
The reason I mention this Is my dreams are involving an increasing fucked up factor. I took a nap before biology and had about a full night’s worth of dreams in about 5 fragments of 10 minute sleep, all consistent in content, before my bio class. It was the worst sleep of my life. The reason I mention this is it was insane, I had to save campus from a girl, who i learned was bad news in a...
Barrens Chat.
I trust nobody has played World of Warcraft but me, thus, I will explain. This is a region of Azeroth which contains animals and an arid climate similar to that of some African regions, some animals even resemble giraffes and elephants. What this place is most notable for; however, is the n00b population. The general chat is composed entirely of pre-pubescent douchebags on EVERY server. To...
An Hour Later?
So, I’ve reconsidered abandoning my education for an epic journey of self-discovery. Perhaps once I’ve accrued some sweet wealth from post-lawschool work, the journey and departure will be feasible. At this moment, I have too many responsibilities to be able to abandon my life. This will have to be a later-life goal made possible by years of hard work and goal-setting. Fuck that. Fuck...
The Future
I had a lovely day after my two classes were over. I decided to get an iced capp and sit by the rose garden because it was so sunny. Perhaps as a result of the uv radiation and gleeful escape from winter, sitting viewing a sailboat, I came to the conclusion that with my life I would like to purchase a sailboat and voyage. When I was little, my mother put a book called “Kids for Sail”...
March 2008
3 posts
Victoria (again)
I got this strange feeling today that I was disentegrating into some sort of stream. It made me really worried because I’ve felt like that more and more, lately. Not so much that I’m falling apart, but that what I am and was is becoming more and more distant, and I’m entering some awful period of adult stagnation, my future ending in some suburbia and working a job I hate and...
Victoria
After a harrowing adventure, meeting Willy from 4th Salish on the ferry, playing pool downtown, and ending up at a house party at some crazy mansion, I am now tucked safely in bed at Eve’s house (Chelsea’s friend). Tomorrow’s day plans include hitting up many thrift and specialty t-shirt stores and eating greasy foodstuffs. I don’t like sleeping in other people’s...